


this is why china line left exo

by Lingling2198



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Don't Judge Me, M/M, This is definitely crack, everyone else is writing chatfics so why can't I, pls appreciate chantao okay, probably won't take the rating up because how can smut, this is me practicing writing fics, yes this is mainly chantao ft other characters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-11
Updated: 2018-05-24
Packaged: 2018-12-13 22:30:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11769714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lingling2198/pseuds/Lingling2198
Summary: Zitao is a little confused as to why Chanyeol seems to be on his dick all of a sudden





	1. awkward

**Author's Note:**

> what's the situation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chanyeol's thirsty and tao's not his bro

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there's a shocking lack of chantao and i'm offended. when i figure out how to smut properly expect more chantao fics. also, looking for someone to read over my stuff and make sure it sounds right! so if you can write fairly well leave a comment? i'm really nice!
> 
>  
> 
> also I've literally just used my texting style for this expect emoticons and shit bc im hella emotive

**real_pcy:**

tao

zitao

**hztttao:**

chanyeol

**real_pcy:**

hey

how's it going

buddy

**hztttao:**

?????

did they send you????

look I've paid sm all the fucking money I owe them go away

**real_pcy:**

bro chill

sm has nothing to do with this man

**hztttao:**

then what are you messaging me for

we don't even follow each other

as a matter of fact, i'm sure I blocked u lol

so why you here

**real_pcy:**

we haven't talked in a while

I miss you

you're annoying but I miss being annoyed

**hztttao:**

.....

**real_pcy:**

deadass

out of all the chinaline members i  liked you the most

**hztttao:**

you a damn lie lmao

what about kris

**real_pcy:**

kris meant nothing to me

_screenshot taken!_

**hztttao:**

oh?

**real_pcy:**

yeah come on bro

lets be bros

bro

**hztttao:**

bitch call be "bro" one more time and i'm blocking you lol

**real_pcy:**

right my b

lets pretend we don't know each other

as if we were never in a group together mkay

hi. chanyeol.

park chanyeol of exo. biggest fan

**hztttao:**

chanyeol you're a fucking dumbass

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FOLLOW ME ON TUMBLR@JJEONTTAE I WRITE FICS THERE TOO. All my fics are crossposted on tumblr, quotev, and Ao3


	2. zhang yixing has been added to 'EX-CHINALINE+ yixing'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so china line has a group chat
> 
> well, ex-china line + Yixing
> 
> tao gets exposed and kris is a titan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> since yixing wasn't in the comeback...
> 
> (◕‿◕✿)

_I Got Juice has added Zhang Yixing to EX-CHINALINE + yixing'_

  
  
**I Got Juice:**  
ayo  
  
**I Got Juice:**  
wassup

**Zhang Yixing:**

wtf 

**Zhang Yixing:**

wtf is this

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

the gc 

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

the main gc for the swag boiiiis

 

**I Got Juice:**

luhan I swear to god i'll kick you out again

 

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

taozi is just gonna add me right back

**CALL ME T.A.O:**

GEGE WHY ARE YOU 

**CALL ME T.A.O:**

!!!!!!!

**I Got Juice:**

he cant add you back if you're banned

**Zhang Yixing:**

i love you guys but 

**Zhang Yixing:**

why am I here?

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

because sir you're the one who's technically not even a member of exo

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

if I'm not mistaken, they've released like 2 albums

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

that you arent in

 

 

**CALL ME T.A.O:**

so we've like extended an invite to join our group chat

 

**Zhang Yixing:**

well I mean titan took it upon himself to just add me  

**Zhang Yixing:**

*Yifan

 

 

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

[//www.youtube.com/embed/NGRHBu-v7iA](//www.youtube.com/embed/NGRHBu-v7iA)

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

yAEGER 

**Zhang Yixing:**

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

 

**I Got Juice:**

sighs

**I Got Juice:**

i didn't leave sm for this fuckery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you haven't noticed i'm chinaline trash lmao


	3. welcome to the exo gc

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> okay so like to clear up confusion;
> 
>  
> 
> oshkosh is sehun
> 
> seokkie is minseok
> 
>  we've got ourselves a traitor boys
> 
> that is all

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welcome to the exo group chat! where jongdae spills the tea

_WE ARE (NOT) ONE! EXO SARANGHANJA_

 

**minseok's wifeu:  
** so guys  
  
**minseok's wifeu:**  
today is a good day 

 

_'Jongexit' just changed "minseok's wifeu's nickname to 'jongdork'_

 

**jongdork:  
** jongin i fuckin h8 you

**Jongexit:  
** ily2 hyung

**Jongexit:  
**

〜٩( ╹▿╹ )۶〜

  
**ksoo:  
** i'm just wondering why were sitting here, being summoned to the chat

**ksoo:**  
when we're rIGHT NEXT TO EACH OTHER

 

**o** **shkosh:**  
^^^^^

**oshkosh:**

re fucking tweet 

**seokkie:**

this is why chinaline left us

**seokkie:**

sips tea

**oshkosh:**

are you sure hyung 

**oshkosh:**

are you sure it's not because of junmyeon hyung being an emotional piece of shit, a horrible mother, and possessing an inability to control his kids? 

**oshkosh:**

or maybe it's because of the fact that chanyeol seemed to tick zitao off everytime he breathed wrong or something because he's chanyeol and he's annoying.  

**oshkosh:**

maybe baekhyun pissed in tao's green tea too 

**oshkosh:**

maybe luhan realized he was straight afterall and tired of Minseok hyung and Jongdae flirting

  **jongdork:**

jongdae  _hyung_

  **oshkosh:**

read 8:39 pm

 

**chanyoda:**

gdi maknae savageeeeeeeee

 

**beaglehyun:**

I'm acc offended wow

**$uho:**

 

**$uho:**

jongdae you're no longer adopted, sehun is  

**jongdork:**

yES FINALLY

**jongdork:**

IT'S ABOUT FUCKING TIME

 

**ksoo:**

okay can we get back to the point please

**ksoo:**

i actually prefer to not spend my off days talking to you heathens so please spill the beans

**jongexit:**

hyung but do you mean to say 

**jongexit:**

whispers 

**jongexit:**

_whats the situation_  

_ksoo has blocked jongexit_

 

_ksoo has left the chat_  

 

**jongdork:**

see look what you did jongidiot

 

_'jongdork' has changed their nickname to 'jongdateable'_

 

_'jongdateable' has changed 'jongexit's nickname to 'jongidiot'_

 

_beaglehyun has added ksoo to the chat_

 

_jongidiot has promoted ksoo to admit_

 

**jongidiot:**

hahahahaha now you can't leave welcome to hell 

**jongidiot:**

（＾ｖ＾）

 

**oshkosh:**

anyway why are we here 

**oshkosh:**

?????

**jongdateable:**

right so

 

 

**jongdateable:**  
buckle your seatbelts bitches ya boi has the tea

**jongidiot:**  
SPILL THE TEA HYUNGGGGG

**beaglehyun** :  
^^^^

 

**jongdateable:**  
a bitch went snooping and found out one of our own has betrayed us

**oshkosh:**  
you a hoe

**oshkosh:**  
wait what

**seokkie:**  
damn wait who's the traitor?

 

**ksoo:**

50,000 won it's baekhyun

**oshkosh:**

most likely

 

**$uho:**

or its jongdae

**chanyoda:**

hyung you might be onto something

 

**seokkie:**

don't come for my man >:(

**oshkosh** :

i fear nothing 

**oshkosh** :

not even you

 

**jongidiot:**

actually minseok hyung you're not as scary as soo 

**baekhyun:**

he right 

**baekhyun:**

u a floof

 

**seokkie:**

i'll floof my foot up your ass try me 

**seokkie:**

i'll fuck all you up

**oshkosh:**

you hear that noise? 

**oshkosh** :

that's the sound of me not being scared  

**jongdateable:**

......

**jongdateable:**

its chanyeol

**oshkosh:**

(」゜ロ゜)」

 

**jongidiot:**

(」゜ロ゜)」 

**beaglehyun:**

(」゜ロ゜)」

 

**seokkie:**

(」゜ロ゜)」

**$uho:**

(」゜ロ゜)」

**ksoo:**

(」゜ロ゜)」

 

**beaglehyun:**

shit what he do

 

**chanyoda:**

not a damn thing this is slander

 

**jongdateable:**

i got receipts from yixing

**jongdateable:**

@xingxing

**jongdateable:**

_sent 7 photos_

**o **sh** kosh:**

hahahaahahhah 

**oshkosh:**

****damn bitch you a thirsty hoe

 

**jongidiot:**

i ship it 

**seokkie:**

damn he pinning hard as fuck

 

**chanyoda:**

 

**chanyoda:**

suddenly I feel so attacked rn

**chanyoda:**

gotta zayn-

 

_jongidiot has promoted chanyoda to admin_

 

**jongidiot:**

surprise mothafucka 

**jongidiot:**

 

**jongdateable:**

#exposed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> poor exo


	4. CHINALINE gang gang

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lol happy valentines day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chinaline is a mess this is just crack 
> 
> expect some chantao next chapter
> 
> MIGHT TAKE THE RATING UP BC I PLAN ON ACTUALLY WRITING SOME PARTS YAY

_ I Got Juice has changed the chat name to 'CHINALINE gang gang' _

**I Got Juice:**

ayo wassup

**I Got Juice:**

guys

**I Got Juice:**

i kNOW y'all are reading this smh

 

_CALL ME T.A.O has changed their name to King Taozi_

**King Taozi:**

here!!!

 

**Zhang Yixing:**

what is this, role call?

**Zhang Yixing:**

we're not in school

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

damn

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

i was gonna tell kris to make me stay after for detention cause I've been a bad boy

 

**Zhang Yixing:**

Wtf-

 

**King Taozi:**

!!!!!!

**King Taozi:**

LU GE THAT'S TMI

 

**I Got Juice:**

luhan what the actual fuck is wrong with you is2g

**I Got Juice:**

AREN'T YOU ENGAGED?!

  
  


**Blow It Like A Flute:**

no

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

but xiao xiao doesn't mind anyways 

**Zhang Yixing:**

I'm praying for your soul

**Zhang Yixing:**

real shit 

**Zhang Yixing:**

when was the last time you went to church bc

**I Got Juice:**

demons don't set foot in the lord's house xing

**I Got Juice:**

he wouldn't be here had he did so

**Zhang Yixing:**

damn. facts af

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

fuck y'all

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

y'all are the reason i left exo anyways

 

**I Got Juice:**

actually you left because I left. 

**I Got Juice:**

#facts

 

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

lie one more time wu yifan

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

one more time

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

i'm no follower tf

**Zhang Yixing:**

ACTUALLY

**Zhang Yixing:**

luhan's bitch ass complained about 'duizhang' leaving over an over again saying there's no chinaline without the original 'ye xing de' and proclaimed after shitty mess entertainment rejected his terms that he was, and I quote

**Zhang Yixing:**

"leaving this shit show lmao bye you'll be hearing from my lawyer"

**Zhang Yixing:**

*sm enternainment 

**Zhang Yixing:**

:)

**I Got Juice:**

screenshots

**I Got Juice:**

that sounds like him lmao

 

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

once again

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

fuck all y'all

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

xiao xiao doesn't treat me like this

**Zhang Yixing:**

then why are you in my dms complaining like a whiny bitch

**Zhang Yixing:**

grow some damn balls han

**Zhang Yixing:**

wife her up

**I Got Juice:**

^^^^^

 

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

wait where did tao go

 

**I Got Juice:**

don't change the damn subject

 

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

no real shit he's been mighty quiet

**Zhang Yixing:**

probably sucking some chanyeol ding a ling

 

**King Taozi:**

cnseofdnovnsef

**King Taozi:**

sLANDER

**King Taozi:**

I HAVENT EVEN TALKED TO THAT BEANPPOLE SINCE HE MESSAGED ME ON INSTAGRAM

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

me smells a lie

**Zhang Yixing:**

oh yeah

**Zhang Yixing:**

I've got screenshots proving otherwise

 

**King Taozi:**

dON'T YOU FCKIKNG DARE SZHANG YIXNG S

**King Taozi:**

colvjfnoenvseo

 

**Zhang Yixing:**

sent 3 photos

**Blow It Like A Flute:**

I can see what's happening 

 

**I Got Juice:**

but they don't have a clue

_ King Taozi has left the chat _

**Zhang Yixing:**

oh no you don't

_ King Taozi has been added to the group _

 

 

_ Zhang Yixing has promoted King Taozi to admin  _

**King Taozi:**

fUCK I CANT LEAVE   
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so I delete my other two works (i lost the motivation) so stay tuned for my newest fic!
> 
> this is unbeta-ed and cracky please forgive me lol i'll try to update once a month but no promises :'))


	5. you a headass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chanyeol's tryna give that succ boi lmaoooo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chanyeol is a headass and a thirsty bitch and he aint slick

**real_pcy:**

you'd look good in a skirt

 

**real_pcy:**

11/10 would approve

 

**hztttao:**

bitch for the 4395395th time im not sucking your dick chanyeol

 

**real_pcy:**

i-

 

**real_pcy:**

i didn't ask you to?

 

**hztttao:**

sigh

 

**hztttao:**

do you know how lame it is to text on Instagram?

 

**hztttao:**

you headass

 

**real_pcy:**

i beg to differ

 

**real_pcy:**

this is what the cool kids are doing 

 

**hztttao:**

sorry to burst your bubble but you've never been a cool kid

 

**real_pcy:**

ouch, you wound me

 

**hztttao:**

just text me you headass

 

**hztttao:**

+86 0532-83832587 

 

 

 

~

 

 **+82 070-6230-0579** : ****

taoooooo

 

 **+82 070-6230-0579** :

zitaoooooo

 

**+86 0532-83832587:**

everytime i text you its like i lose brain cells

 

**+86 0532-83832587 :**

they're rapidly deteriorating

 

_Save +86 0532-83832587 as Taozi (◡‿◡✿)?_

 

 _Save +82 070-6230-0579_   _as Headass ヾ(￣◇￣)ノ?_

 

**Headass ヾ(￣◇￣)ノ:**

oh my bad

 

**Headass ヾ(￣◇￣)ノ:**

nice to know that I've got that effect on you ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

**Taozi (◡‿◡✿):**

chanyeol i swear of you send me that emoiji again, you're blocked

 

 

~ 

 

Chanyeol felt a bright grin stretch onto his face, eyes darting to the name and emoticon on the screen. Really, half the time Zitao was verbally attacking him, calling him an idiot, but he was sure it was fondly and not maliciously. He knows there's no hard feelings about the past; the group just didn't work out. Zitao had admitted he was proud of them for their accomplishments, proud that they've achieved so much. Though he admits that Zitao would've  _killed_ Power, Kokobop, Lotto, and Monster. He just had the look that would've fit it well. He's also fanboyed to him, a lot, in the short time it had been since Chanyeol had taken the first step to reaching out. It's been enarly three years since Zitao left, and Chanyeol still followed him despite Zitao having insisted he'd blocked Chanyeol. But he knew better. The fact that Zitao so willingly gave him his phone number was great; fantastic. Marvelous. That's exactly what Chanyeol thinks as he exits the message screen, leaving Zitao on red so he can tap his contact and hover over the blue phone button, deciding  _fuck it_ and hit it. He stared at his screen as he waited for the other male to pick up, grinning when he did. Zitao looked annoyed, but he always looked annoyed.

 

"Chanyeol do you realize what time it is?" Zitao sounded annoyed, tired. Yet he wasn't hanging up and was in fact, seeming to get comfortable in his bed. Judging by his surroundings, he had been in bed the entire time, cheeks puffy and face squeaky clean. Chanyeol doesn't mentally swoon. His heart doesn't go doki doki from this. He maintained a pockerface, a neutral grin on it. 

 

"Yeah but I figured we could facetime, you know? I'm not doing anything, you're not doing anything. Optimal time for the face timing," he saw the look Zitao gave him, but the other male sighed and ran a hand through his dark hair. 

 

"Okay. So what do you want to talk about?" 

 

Chanyeol hadn't really gotten this far into the plan, figuring he just wanted some form of face to face conversation. He hadn't really contacted Zitao on a whim; it was more like he saw fans talking about him on twitter and decided that maybe he wanted to chat too. He wanted toc heck in on him and see how he was doing, but checking in led to borderline stalking and maybe not the most secretive crush he's had but it wasn't _that_ bad. He just figured it was him fanboying and missing one of his "brothers". But looking at him now, a lot healthier, more carefree, Chanyeol was happy he left. Happy for _him_ that he got out of something that he didn't like. Zitao was always, had always, been the type  to achieve whatever he put his mind to; he was headstrong and worked hard. The life he'd been living? It wasn't that  _he_ wasn't cut out for it, it was because  _it_ wasn't fit for him. Chanyeol remembered being so angry when Zitao left, after all he'd said about Yifan when he left and how he'd reacted to Luhan leaving, yet he turned right around and abandoned them too. It was rough, horrible, but they all got over it. 

 

"Chanyeol Park, you realize how late it is?" Zitao sounded huffy, a little sleepy. Chanyeol's heart didn't lurch nor did he think it was cute. 

 

"I uh. Hi," He heard a laugh on the other end, watching Zitao rub at his eyes. 

 

"Hi, you're an idiot," he sounded so fond that Chanyeol almost choked on his uwus. He wanted to smother Zitao with uwus, fuck that. 

 

"Where are you now?" He suddenly blurted. Zitao snorted, a small little smile on his kittenish lips. "In my bed,"

 

Chanyeol giggled, stupidly, knowing that the uwu was so strong right now. "You know what I mean. You're at home?" Zitao made a noncommittal noise, but nodded. "Yeah, I haven't been to Korea since I left the group. How's everyone?"

 

"We're all fine. Doing our own thing, got a new subunit,"

 

"The one with Baekhyun, Jondgae, and Minseok yeah?"

 

"Yeah, CBX," Chanyeol adjusted himself in bed, snuggling under his sheets with his head popping out. Zitao looked at him and grinned. 

 

"You look really fluffy," His cheeks tinted pink, and Chanyeol fucking uwu'd so fucking hard. 

 

"You look fluffy too," He countered with a smile, causing Zitao to sort of hide but he laughed, probably shyly probably awkwardly. 

 

"Your flirting is really lame, you know that right?" 

 

 

~

 

_WE ARE (NOT) ONE_

 

**chanyoda:**

hey? 

 

**chanyoda:**

guys?

 

**$uho:**

chanyeol go to sleep

 

**oshkosh:**

****you're mighty loud at 2 am

 

**beaglehyun:**

bro whats wrong

 

**ksoo:**

i'm muting this gn

 

**chanyoda:**

are my flirting skills bad?

 

**oshkosh:**

****is the sky blue?

 

**jongdateable:**

chanyeol is 2am what are you on about 

 

**jongdateable:**

it's literally 2am

 

**chanyoda:**

yes but tao said my flirting skills suck

 

**jongidiot:**

wait

 

**jongidiot:**

wayment

 

**beaglehyun:**

......

 

**seokkie:**

bitch

 

**ksoo:**

...…….

 

**oshkosh:**

****hahahaahahahahaahahahahahahahaha

 

**oshkosh:**

i fucking knew it 

 

**chanyoda:**

pls help it's an emergency

 

**chanyoda:**

he insulted my flirting

 

**jongidot:**

hyung your flirting is really bad

 

**jongidiot:**

its so bad that it kills boners and dries up panties

 

**jongidiot:**

and this is  _tao_ we're talking about lmao he don't want you

 

**oshkosh:**

****you crusty musty and dusty hyung nobody wants you

 

**$uho:**

i have to agree with jongin, your flirting is really bad

 

**ksoo:**

i second that

 

**beaglehyun:**

yah bro its not the best

 

**seokkie:**

"musty crusty dusty" IM

 

**jongdateble:**

i can tutor you in the art of dating 

 

**jongidiot:**

hoe don't do it

 

**chanyoda:**

really??? 

 

**jongidiot:**

OH MY GOD

 

**jongdateable:**

yah bro

 

**chanyoda:**

uwu

 

**oshkosh:**

no not the uwu

 

**oshkosh:**

im vomit

 

**jongdateable:**

i'll make a man of you

 

**jongdateable:**

baek and seokkie you're being drafted 

 

**beaglehyun:**

are you making this a cbx thing

 

**seokkie:**

(꒪⌓꒪)

 

**jongidiot:**

man yall are so gay i can't even

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chantao is my otp
> 
> i also don't know how Chinese phone numbers work, i'm American lmao


	6. issa hot mess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cbx plans to help chanyeol seduce tao
> 
> tao isn't phased
> 
> chanyeol is the gay panic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> baekhyun made a twitter go follow him! @b_hundred_hyun
> 
> i hope yall enjoy this trash

_chanyoda has been added to CHEN BAEK XI HEADQUARTERS_

 

**chanyoda:**

so is this ccbx now

 

 **minnie hyung** : ****

bitch don't press your luck lmao

 

**jongdab:**

you're at 10, bring it down to a 1 pls

 

**beaglehyun:**

on today's agenda in the super cool chenbaekxi chat

 

**beaglehyun:**

we're here to help our buddy chanyeol out with his issue 

 

**minnie hyung:**

*****your buddy

 

**jongdab:**

i actually like chanyeol lmao

 

**jongdab:**

he's a good kid

 

**chanyoda:**

uwu thx bro

 

**jongdab:**

suddenly I don't know a chanyeol

 

**jongdab:**

read 3:45am

 

**minnie hyung:**

okay so why are we being summoned so early

 

**minnie hyung:**

aging gracefully is a thing u bafoons

 

**beaglehyun:**

yah bro this is important business like SSS ranked mission ya feel

 

**jongdab:**

baek everytime you try to be hip I swear I lose a few brain cell neurons

 

**chanyoda:**

:'((

 

**chanyoda:**

tao tells me the same thing

 

**minnie hyung:**

wat

 

**minnie hyung:**

since when did you have brain cells lmfao

 

**chanyoda:**

since week 7 of the gestational period my dude

 

 **beaglehyun:  
**...……...

**jongdab:**

boy what

 

**minnie hyung:**

i fucking quit gn

 

 

~

 

"Well first off, look at you. Fumbling around like some gangly idiot. If you're going to FaceTime someone you like, make yourself look somewhat presentable," Baekhyun directs from his spot in front of Chanyeol at the table, phone face up on the table. Twitter open as he looks from Chanyeol to the app on his phone. They all share a collective twitter account, but Baekhyun decided to be extra and create his own. He's been on it all day, even when Chanyeol asked him to come and get coffee with him. Jongdae pushes his wire-framed glasses up his nose, taking over the conversation since Baekhyun's attention isn't all there, rolling his eyes in the process.

 

"Look, all you have to do is be you bro. He knows you. Hell, he's seen your dick  _plenty_ of times. We all have. We're bros, even though you know. They left and all," he shrugs, reaching for his drink. Chanyeol held his own hot coffee in both hands, staring down at the elaborate design in it. "Just don't be  _too_ weird. Don't change yourself for anyone but like you know, clean up a little. Be a little less...Chanyeol. If possible,"

 

"But you just said-"

 

"I said what I said but I'm getting my dick sucked on a regular, now aren't I?  _Exactly,"_ Baekhyun decides to look up at that point, squinting. 

 

"Jongdae the only thing sucking your dick is that fleshlight under your bed," He says blankly, causing the other to sputter, Jongdae shoving at Baekhyun who breaks into a smile while Chanyeol wheezes, glancing down at his phone. Seeing a text from Zitao of him—really his feet—on the deck of a boat. Overlooking a crystal blue sea. Chanyeol makes a sighing noise, sliding his phone over to the bickering duo. 

 

"Look, man I've never seen this much money and we're in one of the biggest groups in South Korea," he whines, watching Jongdae and Baekhyun peer over at him, eyeing the picture. Baekhyun makes a shocked noise but looks up at Chanyeol. 

 

"Well, Taozi has always been rather rich," he points out. Chanyeol thinks back on this, thinking back to how Zitao seemed to  _always_ have nice things. As trainees, he was the only one with an iPhone. Wore designer and even got regular monetary checks from his parents in China to survive, buying them gifts with said checks as they debuted and formed EXO together. Chanyeol wasn't piss poor without EXO but designer brands weren't in his shopping cart growing up. Zitao was  _blessed_ with money and now that he was on his own, there was money  _everywhere._ Like really, he was on a yacht.  _A yacht._

 

"Let him be your sugar daddy Channie," Jongdae pipes, sipping at his drink. Chanyeol shakes his head. 

 

"Nah man. He's younger than me,"

"So?

"So, he's the baby, I'm the daddy. Besides, I'm a top. Can't be having whiny little Tao dicking me down now can I?" he sounds proud of himself, but Jongdae and Baekhyun look at him like he's grown two heads. They sigh, shaking their heads. "What?" Chanyeol asks, noting their silence.

 

 

~

 

**bbyun:**

hey fellow gay whats good

 

**chanyeollie:**

nceoivero bro

im not gay

yet

 

**bbyun:**

chanyeol

park chanyeol

i've known you forever

stop lying to urself

**chanyeollie:**

（；＿；）

**bbyun:**

u seen his dick yet

i bet it's massive

 

**chanyeollie:**

bAEKHYUN I SWEAR TO GOD-

PLEASE

I BEG

 

**bbyun:**

so you have

o i c 

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**chanyeollie:**

pls man i need advice

you and dae were no help today

**bbyun:**

what u need

lube brands? sex tips? need help with angles for dick pics?

 

**chanyeollie:**

jfc baekhyun

he said “we should hand out sometime”

like what does that mEAN

 

**bbyun:**

that your dry spell is over and it’s time to get that dingaling

or he’s coming here and just wants to chill man

**chanyeollie:**

screams

wHAT

neoigvergreor

he wants to hang out??   
here???

with me????

fUCK IM NOT READY FOR THIS ABORT

 

**bbyun:**

dude chill its just a date

bc its obvi there’s some kind of connection

some kind of bond

**chanyeollie:**

HOW CAN I CHILL

WHAT IS HAPPEING

HOW DO I

FUCK

**bbyun:**

chanyeol.exe has shut down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cbx is unhelpful lmao
> 
> sorry this chapter took forever but i've been busy with school and starting other fics and stuff but hopefully I can be consistent with my updates and go for monthly instead of weekly or whatever I said :')

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know what this is but it's something
> 
> note: tao isn't in exo in this


End file.
